I am used to calling HIM "Papa". There is this feeling of ease whenever I call HIM that name.
But who is HE indeed?
There was a time when I felt ashamed with HIM as I call HIM, "Papa". I don't feel worthy enough to call him with that name, for I am a daughter of Adam, and I am a sinner. I am aware of wrong and right things, yet I sometimes chose to do wrong. I had always admitted my mistakes as I realize them. I repent, but how many times should I have to repent for the same mistake?

How close am I?

"How close are you to God?" I believe, the host's introductory question in SFC's Chapter assembly is a kind of question that I've been hearing most of the time.
And back of my mind, I used to answer, SO CLOSE!
so close that I used to call Him "Papa";
so close that I treat Him like a friend;
so close that I used to talk with Him whenever I want to, wherever I am (if I wanted to share something, either good or not so good things);
so close that I use to "push eyes" whenever I pass by His church and say "hello Papa" (just like greeting somebody when you passed by one's house and saw him there);
so close that I use to give Him a hand sign of peace, "push eyes", a bow, and a "Bye bye, sa sunod ulit" whenever I go out of His house;
so close that whenever I feel cold, I just close my eyes and ask Him, "pahug naman Papa";
so close that I tell Him right away what I really feel inside;
so close that I tell Him my secrets;
so close that I tell it to Him directly whenever I questioned Him;
so close that I address my question directly to Him;
so close that I did say this words, "nakakainis Ka naman Papa, bakit ganito...bakit ganun?" or like "di Kita maintindihan, di Kita marinig, paexplain naman ng gusto Mo mangyari";

but, as I gave all this answers, I asked myself again, "am I really close to Him?". My answers above are same things that I would probably do for a close friend of mine. But is this how close He wanted me to be, with Him? Yes, He is a friend, but He is not just a friend. He is much more than that. He is my Master, and above all He is my God. Is that what He's supposed to expect from me?

That was something I have to think again. I have to check myself, "Am I really that close to Him?"...